Links & Resources Mentioned:
https://www.directorsmortgage.com/loan-officer/adrian-schermer
Episode 14 Transcript
Growth Through Failure Final
Hello, future millionaires. I want to start off with one of my favorite quotes.
“If one does not fail at times, then one has not challenged himself.” – Ferdinand Porsche
Failure is such an important part of growth and the pathway to success in life, whether in being a millionaire, or just a personal success at your own metric.
Failure Is What Teaches Us And What Drives Us Forward If Used Properly.
The beauty of this topic is there’s so many directions, we can go with it. For the last number of years I’ve been mentoring, molding and creating a team. There’s a way to ensure that failure is the right kind of failure, if that makes sense. And I have a quick story about that.
Life should be about pushing ourselves to those echelons. If you stay within your safe zone, and you never fail. It’s a great feedback loop. It feels right. But generally, it means that there’s something left on the table that you could push a little bit harder or that maybe, you know, you should challenge yourself take on something that’s outside of your comfort zone until it is within your comfort zone.
Neurons That Fire Together, Wire Together
So if you are a happy person, you go out into life with an attitude of positivity and love and compassion, then your brain will wire for those things. So when you go out into the world, you are already pre wired to seek out things that bring you happiness, joy, pleasure, and people who do too. Similarly, if you are a negative person, if you’re a worrier, if you’re stressed all the time, you will actually attract problematic situations. Now, that sounds easier said than done.
But it explains a lot why people have such a hard time escaping trauma, it explains why these sort of things follow us into life and why it’s so important to slow down. And we talk a lot in this podcast about the idea of living deliberately. This is something that you’re not just going to wake up one day and go, I decided I’m going to be a positive person, and I’m not going to let that failure bother me. Failure should bother you. It’s a great learning tool, and it should hurt.
Failure Should Bother You
You know, there’s luck, but a lot of times it’s the resilience that that gets someone to the point of being successful. I’ve been fired, I’ve been laid off. I got fired from a $15 an hour tech support job.
But you know, I made six figures last year, I’m happy to say and that failure was an important step on the pathway to where I am now. I think that there’s a there’s a key concept today’s popular culture. We spend so much time affirming, which is a great thing to do.
But there is a higher level of that feedback loop that you just mentioned, and it is the people that you actually care about. You should be creating a feedback loop. Now, that feedback loop is based on the permission and the roles that you take. And a big part of that is, can I give you some feedback? This is throwback to a system called manager tools. What it does is sets up an expectation that you ask, “Can I give you some feedback?” The perfect feedback loop or feedback request takes about 15 seconds, and it’s not dwelling on anything. It’s not laying blame, it’s not doing anything other than, “Hey, can I give you some feedback? “Then I say, “Adrian, when we worked through this process with the client, it led to a negative result. Let’s do it this way from now on so we can get the positive result that we want. Is that cool?” So now you’re not mad at me, you’re mad at the problem and we’re working on the problem together. That problem was ours together, it’s our problem, it’s our problem to solve. This led to this, which was less than desirable, so let’s do this instead. This is the only kind of relationship that you should have with people- professional or unprofessional. As human beings, we have blind spots for ourselves.
The concept is to make mistakes and set up a culture within your personal and business relationships, where you have people that are invested enough in you that they will go through that conflict to actually point out and give you feedback. Then actually be able to learn from mistakes where you were self-identified or identified by other trusted relationships.
10 years ago, I was not good at my craft. I have failed many, many, many times to get to the point and learn from an incredible amount of mistakes. I’ve been very, very fortunate to have mentors, people that I worked with, that were specifically invested enough in the relationship that I have with them, to point out those blind spots
Chase Those Relationships.
The people that are willing to give you feedback, that are willing to point out your failure. It can be really, really dangerous when you have that cultural of niceness. I’ve realized that those deeper relationships are the ones that have a mutual value that comes out of that. So get out there, take care of yourself, and embrace the failures that you might have.
Don’t forget that personal care and self-care is important. Go take a shower, go do your laundry, clean your car out, whatever it is that you need to do. Do something for yourself when you have a failure is one of my favorite pieces of advice. Learn from it, and you’ll get better.
Thanks for joining us again today, guys. We’ll see you next week.
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